Jerk theory

How should i start my first sentence? my mind is blank.
i lost you once again . There much things to do for you,
if you meet the guy who do these for you, please remember i can too, but there's no chance for me to do so.

if i was a boy, there much to be done for you.
we never have a real date.
This date is like i can drove my car to pick you up from your house.
and i'll walk straight to your door with roses in my hand and walk you to my car and open the car door for you.
we'll have movie,shopping and dinner at restaurant which you like the most.
till nite, i'll sent you home, and the same walk you to ur door, embrace you and gave you a goodnite kiss.

If we're still able to,
every special day, i can date you, and make you full of surprise.
i should bought a camera, took down all your smile, your natural act, and make it a book of our memory.
there's alot things i'm planning to done for you.
but .... where are you?

you can go or you can stay,
but dont ignore me.
can we back together again? dear.

short update.

fyi, i'm an idiot in dealing love business, lol..

is my eyes swallon? lol ;)
cause crying heh...

bye bye

i'm gona disappear, sayonara.
huhuhu..

Finally

Time pass really quickly,
is December, yaa. is december
is was like a blink of eye, every thing change and pass
and like was finally, i'm gona head to a trip with her.

What was my feeling now?
am i happy? idk. complicated feeling running through my vein.
one second, i'm so happy that i'm able to be by your side for 24hours, take a good care of you
another second, i'm sad when trip ends in 5days,  and idk when we'll have chance to see each other again.
you don't have any reason to go out again. i'm really afraid that we'll getting cold and colder and at the end you gonna leave me. hmm.. ;(
dear, i'm really not prepared to lost you yet.

2011 of march, you might enter college
you'll have your own new life,new friends
and different concept.
u might mind what people know what are your relation.
if these happen, what am i suppose to do.
idk idk idk.
i dunwan i dunwan i dunwan...
i really not ready to let you go. :c dear ah dear..
how how how.. i know i'm irritable, sorry
please don't leave me :'c i need you la wey.

;@

now i'm piss, freaking piss !
actually i'm always piss of that fucking shit guy!
i dont know why i need to hate him so much.
is just i couldnt control my fucking emotional when i mention about him!

i couldnt scold, i couldnt hit someone like that with no reason,
but yes i can,i'll hit him with my bare hand one day! maybe
whatever!! just let me express through here. below is some irritating words,
don't read if u couldnt bare those words.

fuckyou son of the bitch!!
yes i'm rude, so wat??!!! slap me if u can!
NAH! but you dont have the fucking chance.
too bad, i know where you stay aha.
i dint spy on you, i just know where you stay.
so which mean i have the chance to slap you 1st? hah.
sorry i wont slap, is just too ladyyyy act. let try some err...punching? hah!

(he doesnt know i scolding him, if anyone see through my blog if you know him, you can tell him, yay, be my pleasure)

gaaaaahh
~!@#$%^&*()_~!@#$%^&*()~!@#$%^&*()~!@#$%^&*()_+~!@#$%^&*()_
~!@#$%^&*()_~!@#$%^&*()_~!@#$%^&*()_

p/s: above is just a pure scolding script. enjoy reading. ;)

by the way, i'm still a humour person,don't freak out.

After A Kiss

After a kiss is a nice song from a movie "saving face",
is an abnormal movie i guess,for those who is "straight" LOL
my blog playing this song,enjoy it..heheh..

That movie quite meaningful,
contain of dilemma which we left hander's love had or must face,
left road aren't easy as u think.

Some person thought left hander way or road is a trend nowadays,
they learn and act as,to feel or make them become fame in what so called "L world"/ PLU life social.

These people they doesn't really come to realize the thruth
when they couldn't bare the pointing from society,or their acceptance from their family, or one day they wake and realise they aint gay and become a "straight" and cruely leave their partners who was a real/true left hander.

Guess what? you never know how's their heart break and fall. And you never know, how much heartache they have to look at u kisses with sombody else. If it was a same gender, that's might be alright,but it wasn't, and they have to bare that feel that i couldnt describe, that complicate,gloom feel.

Is ain't easy to find a person who is into the same kind of social with you.
If you are normal but there's really come to a feeling to a left hander,please be true and appreciate and try go as long as both can to strive for accept by everyone.
Because, i know every left hander person, they will sacrifice,fight and do anything for you, just to want u have a happiness life.

So,please be true and be fair.
Left hander's love is not a game.
is just in a wrong time,we fall for a same gender.

Remember,

never say i love you, if you don't really care

never talk about feelings,if they aren't really true

never touch a life, if you mean to break a heart

never say you're going to, if you don't plan to start

never looked into my eyes, when all you do is lie

never say hello, if you really means goodbye.